Because you see people wondering down the streets in raggedy clothes, when you go to school you are thought of as "dirty", the way people treat you is as if you do not belong, you can't help, but think that the world you were born into is one full of unfairness and unrighteousness. Our world is full of these these two things; but it is also full of love, justice, and happiness. But how can these very different concepts all exist in one world? The answer to this question can all become summed down to one word: life. During the process of living, all people have to endure these things; it is the only way to live.
In A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, Francie experiences all of these things on her way from innocence to experience. Learning to deal with each one of these is a skill that each person must attain to make it through life. Mastering these things takes all your life to learn and most people never actually learn to accept all of them before they leave this earth. While making the journey through innocence to experience, people are completing their circle of life. Slowly, slowly people are weaving together all the facts, information, tips and secrets of their lives and piecing them together in a circle; their circle, of life. Only a handful of people can learn to shape their lives into a complete circle before death knocks on their door; and these people are the most precious people of all.
For instance, when Francie meets the old man at Losher's bread factory, he has already finished weaving his circle and now it sits, old and dusty, waiting for the right time to have it's strings cut loose. This old man is already experience and he is showing the innocent ones that one day, they will have to make their way to experience; one day finish weaving their own circle. In the novel, Francie struggles with comprehending the different concepts of her life. She is stricken with poverty and all around her is unfairness; but because of her innocence she does not see all of these things as what they are. She sees them as her. Along her way in becoming experience, she begins to see these ideas, that seem so impossible to grasp, as life. Which is what they are.
Living on this earth, breathing the air that we breath, we are all connected. We are all brought together by the journey we make, the journey that leads us to becoming an experienced world. Since we are brought together by this journey, we are also separated by it because only some of us make it to the absolute ending of this journey, and others miss it by mere inches, mere threads of our circles. It is important to understand that our life, all of our threads, is our journey, our journey from innocence to experience, and everything we have learned throughout the process.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
Weaknesses
Wanting, wanting something you know you should not receive. Forever feeling the pain of this wanting, knowing that this pain will only stop when what you want is resting on your palms. Only this, this thing you try so desperately to get hold of, will satisfy you; and you know it is not out of reach. Every human has a weakness; they are what make us humans and carry us along through our struggles in life. Giving in to your weaknesses shows just what kind of a person you are, and if you choose to give in to your weakness, people will see you as weak.
Having a weakness, as Francie's father does in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, is not something to be ashamed of; letting your weakness break you down is something to be ashamed of. Johnny not only gives in to his weakness, but he lets it destroy him; and he knows that it won. Sissy also has a weakness that she tends to allow control over her; giving birth to a healthy, beautiful baby. This weakness has caused her to feel the pain of much loss, yet she does not give up on winning over her weakness. When you win against your weaknesses, you become stronger; being strong in Brooklyn was a very important thing.
Francie knew that her father was a drunk; she knew he tried to give it all up, and she knew he was too weak to do so. Knowing what your weakness is, and trying to correct it, are completely different tasks. Johnny knew that his drinking was causing him and his family to lose money and he knew that people in the neighborhood thought that he was a bad father; he thought so too. Johnny continued to drink and waste his life away; by the time he decided to stomp his habit, it was too late. His weakness won the battle, and cost him his life.
Letting the control you have over your life be taken away from you, giving in to its power; its calling. Terminating the one thing that you cannot resist, will save your life; save your family members from hurt, shame, because becoming weaker than what makes yourself weak, will, in one form or another, kill you.
Having a weakness, as Francie's father does in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, is not something to be ashamed of; letting your weakness break you down is something to be ashamed of. Johnny not only gives in to his weakness, but he lets it destroy him; and he knows that it won. Sissy also has a weakness that she tends to allow control over her; giving birth to a healthy, beautiful baby. This weakness has caused her to feel the pain of much loss, yet she does not give up on winning over her weakness. When you win against your weaknesses, you become stronger; being strong in Brooklyn was a very important thing.
Francie knew that her father was a drunk; she knew he tried to give it all up, and she knew he was too weak to do so. Knowing what your weakness is, and trying to correct it, are completely different tasks. Johnny knew that his drinking was causing him and his family to lose money and he knew that people in the neighborhood thought that he was a bad father; he thought so too. Johnny continued to drink and waste his life away; by the time he decided to stomp his habit, it was too late. His weakness won the battle, and cost him his life.
Letting the control you have over your life be taken away from you, giving in to its power; its calling. Terminating the one thing that you cannot resist, will save your life; save your family members from hurt, shame, because becoming weaker than what makes yourself weak, will, in one form or another, kill you.
Friday, December 4, 2009
The Fear
Feeling the way your brain slowly looses control, watching the strangers pass by and know that there is something different about you, something peculiar, something that even these people, people that don’t even know you, can see; and they stay away. Having the knowledge of your friends beginning to back off, one by one, the people who you used to laugh with, used to talk to for hours on end, the people who you used to care for so deeply, are vanishing into thin air around you. When you come home, your family members don’t try to talk to you, don’t ask you about your day, and never come to your room, because they know that you are no longer the person you used to be.
Even though all of these people might know everything about you or nothing at all, they can see. They can see that you chose to separate yourself from the rest of the world, and they can see that you are slowly building a world of your own, a world from which you watch everything on the outside happening; seeing the stares, the shape of people’s mouths forming around hateful words, the pained looks of those who you used to know, but the door to your world only opens from one side, and you are never opening that door again, and they know it. They know that you are far, far away from them, and you are never coming back. Friendship and family become such needed aspects of our lives, that, if these bonds are broken, self isolation and detachment may strike, which is a problem we all deeply fear.
“But she remembered and stood quietly apart from all of them and watched the patterning windows. And once, a month ago, she had refused to shower in the school shower rooms, had clutched her hands to her ears and over her head, screaming the water mustn't touch her head. So after that, dimly, dimly, she sensed it, she was different and they knew her difference and kept away.” Margot drove herself mad in her own little world that revolved around the sun and the sun only; she kept herself away from others, and they kept themselves away from her, afraid of being infected by her, like she was a disease, and part of her was.
That part of her was the insanity. Becoming isolated from the people who you love and care for not only takes a toll on those around you, but it also plays it’s part on your emotions; your mental structure begins to fall apart at the edges and soon the part as a whole starts to come loose, and losing your grip on sanity altogether becomes an inevitable outcome.
As well as going insane, losing all your will to live belongs under the isolation category. When one no longer has people to depend on, nor can one be depended on, one finds themselves alone, alone and with nothing. This nothingness drives those to the verge of death, they speed down the road of life and stop just before the edge; lingering on whether or not those last few feet from the end, the end of life, are worth backing up for, or pressing down hard on the gas. Once the state of isolation takes over, the gas is a much less painful decision.
When you isolate yourself from your friends and family, your brain looses its function, looses its ability to control your thoughts, your movements, your words; you are no longer in control. The insanity is. Isolating yourself hurts you and those whom you love, and hurting people and yourself is the only future you have. This choice is one that is unsuitable for all people, and by choosing to go down that path, you choose to end the person inside of you, and let insanity wash over your mind, something rather beyond fear; absolutely and utterly terrorizing.
Even though all of these people might know everything about you or nothing at all, they can see. They can see that you chose to separate yourself from the rest of the world, and they can see that you are slowly building a world of your own, a world from which you watch everything on the outside happening; seeing the stares, the shape of people’s mouths forming around hateful words, the pained looks of those who you used to know, but the door to your world only opens from one side, and you are never opening that door again, and they know it. They know that you are far, far away from them, and you are never coming back. Friendship and family become such needed aspects of our lives, that, if these bonds are broken, self isolation and detachment may strike, which is a problem we all deeply fear.
“But she remembered and stood quietly apart from all of them and watched the patterning windows. And once, a month ago, she had refused to shower in the school shower rooms, had clutched her hands to her ears and over her head, screaming the water mustn't touch her head. So after that, dimly, dimly, she sensed it, she was different and they knew her difference and kept away.” Margot drove herself mad in her own little world that revolved around the sun and the sun only; she kept herself away from others, and they kept themselves away from her, afraid of being infected by her, like she was a disease, and part of her was.
That part of her was the insanity. Becoming isolated from the people who you love and care for not only takes a toll on those around you, but it also plays it’s part on your emotions; your mental structure begins to fall apart at the edges and soon the part as a whole starts to come loose, and losing your grip on sanity altogether becomes an inevitable outcome.
As well as going insane, losing all your will to live belongs under the isolation category. When one no longer has people to depend on, nor can one be depended on, one finds themselves alone, alone and with nothing. This nothingness drives those to the verge of death, they speed down the road of life and stop just before the edge; lingering on whether or not those last few feet from the end, the end of life, are worth backing up for, or pressing down hard on the gas. Once the state of isolation takes over, the gas is a much less painful decision.
When you isolate yourself from your friends and family, your brain looses its function, looses its ability to control your thoughts, your movements, your words; you are no longer in control. The insanity is. Isolating yourself hurts you and those whom you love, and hurting people and yourself is the only future you have. This choice is one that is unsuitable for all people, and by choosing to go down that path, you choose to end the person inside of you, and let insanity wash over your mind, something rather beyond fear; absolutely and utterly terrorizing.
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